Tuesday, September 20, 2016

What is Trauma?

Some people don't simply understand what trauma is.  In a basic sense, it is when a person is "overwhelmed by events or circumstances and responds with intense fear, horror, and helplessness."  Examples appear in the tree on this infographic:  http://www.thenationalcouncil.org/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/Trauma-infographic.pdf

My trauma started at age 7, when my family moved to Atlanta.  This is where I began to spend Sundays with my grandfather, whom we would come to learn was a pedophile.  As an already shy and introverted child, this experience hit me like a brick wall leaving me more introverted and scared of people.  The trauma didn't stop there, it continued in finding unhealthy relationships with others around me.  I felt like I was marked and trapped in a personal narrative of shock.  There are some events that changed this:

a) I engaged in a therapeutic relationship with a therapist.
b) I began to draw my feelings.
c) I began to journal my feelings.
d) I took medication when a mental health condition struck.
e) I learned how to seek healing relationships to replace the unhealthy ones.
f) I stopped drinking.
g) I found Georgia peer support and acquired new friends and skills (www.gmhcn.org)
h) I sought connection with other survivors to advocate and discuss trauma.
i) I started to create skills resources and share what I have learned.


We do not have to be silent, we can come together to share stories of healing and change the narrative.


You Made a Difference Friend, May You Inspire Others:

I sent this to 3 newspapers and not one had time to write a story on friendship.  So, here I will publish this tribute to an amazing woman.   


North Augusta, SC, September 19, 2016:  Today Miriam Culbertson will be remembered at Posey Funeral Home in North Augusta.  She has been my friend since I moved next door to her.  In 2003, I woke up in my home and thought it was filled with gas, I could hear the media outside calling me a witch, and I was sure someone was trying to poison me.  I fled to my car with my dog.  Miriam saw me and tried to give me a hug.  I told her to stay away, as I thought she had ill intentions.  I ended up driving up ad down the East Coast in fear of an entity I couldn’t find.  Then 4 hospitalizations later, I came home and Miriam was still there.  She stayed by my side when illness struck in a way that the younger people in my life just did not.  She was a rock, always there for me even when my career that evolved in peer support took me to Nebraska.  She always was on the other end of the phone till now.  I miss my friend dearly, but want to encourage people in the community to continue to reach out to people with mental illness in the community.  You can make a difference just by a conversation and being there.  Sharing her faith and love was such a precious gift and I am stronger because of her love.  Reach out and be a friend to someone struggling.  A friend makes the difference.  Miriam speaks at the end of this video I made for a “What a difference a friend makes” video contest years ago: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=--zGp7rpWuY&app=desktop


Miriam Culbertson and Carol Coussons de Reyes, 2004, North Augusta