Some people don't simply understand what trauma is. In a basic sense, it is when a person is "overwhelmed by events or circumstances and responds with intense fear, horror, and helplessness." Examples appear in the tree on this infographic: http://www.thenationalcouncil.org/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/Trauma-infographic.pdf
My trauma started at age 7, when my family moved to Atlanta. This is where I began to spend Sundays with my grandfather, whom we would come to learn was a pedophile. As an already shy and introverted child, this experience hit me like a brick wall leaving me more introverted and scared of people. The trauma didn't stop there, it continued in finding unhealthy relationships with others around me. I felt like I was marked and trapped in a personal narrative of shock. There are some events that changed this:
a) I engaged in a therapeutic relationship with a therapist.
b) I began to draw my feelings.
c) I began to journal my feelings.
d) I took medication when a mental health condition struck.
e) I learned how to seek healing relationships to replace the unhealthy ones.
f) I stopped drinking.
g) I found Georgia peer support and acquired new friends and skills (www.gmhcn.org)
h) I sought connection with other survivors to advocate and discuss trauma.
i) I started to create skills resources and share what I have learned.
We do not have to be silent, we can come together to share stories of healing and change the narrative.
Tuesday, September 20, 2016
You Made a Difference Friend, May You Inspire Others:
I sent this to 3 newspapers and not one had time to write a story on friendship. So, here I will publish this tribute to an amazing woman.
North Augusta, SC, September 19, 2016 :
Today Miriam Culbertson will be
remembered at Posey Funeral Home in North Augusta. She has been my friend since I moved next
door to her. In 2003, I woke up in my
home and thought it was filled with gas, I could hear the media outside calling
me a witch, and I was sure someone was trying to poison me. I fled to my car with my dog. Miriam saw me and tried to give me a
hug. I told her to stay away, as I
thought she had ill intentions. I ended
up driving up ad down the East Coast in fear of an entity I couldn’t find. Then 4 hospitalizations later, I came home
and Miriam was still there. She stayed
by my side when illness struck in a way that the younger people in my life just
did not. She was a rock, always there
for me even when my career that evolved in peer support took me to
Nebraska. She always was on the other
end of the phone till now. I miss my
friend dearly, but want to encourage people in the community to continue to
reach out to people with mental illness in the community. You can make a difference just by a
conversation and being there. Sharing
her faith and love was such a precious gift and I am stronger because of her
love. Reach out and be a friend to
someone struggling. A friend makes the
difference. Miriam speaks at the end of
this video I made for a “What a difference a friend makes” video contest years
ago: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=--zGp7rpWuY&app=desktop
Miriam Culbertson and Carol Coussons de Reyes, 2004, North Augusta |
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